A quote I've recently heard keeps coming to mind while thinking about this chapter in my "Supernaturally Dysfunctional" book. Simply stated, "he who angers you controls you." Well, if you've already read chapter 8, I am sure you have a pretty good idea of who was controlling the biological grandfather I never knew.
An interesting physical phenomenon occurs as we human beings become angered. The heart rate increases, blood pressure goes up, the neck or face may become hot, our jaw could clinch, teeth grinding might occur, chest tightens, stomach aches sometimes happen, we might shake or tremble, and holding our breath are all common by-products of it. In a nutshell, anger is not a pleasant feeling that most don't care for or try to avoid altogether. The ending of anger outbursts usually leaves us feeling exhausted and far worse than before we ever got mad in the first place. It's wasted energy.
Obviously, most well functioning adults have outgrown their toddler tantrum tendencies and have learned how to deal with moments of anger in a safe and civilized manner. No one is perfect and everyone gets angry once in a while. It's our behavior while being angry that usually takes center stage. Sometimes during fits of anger we could temporarily lose the ability to think or speak clearly, say things we don't mean, or at our weakest point, allow an unintelligent word or two slip through. Words said in anger are often the hardest to forget or forgive.
I cried a lot during the writing of "Supernaturally Dysfunctional." For me, personally, several topics were gut wrenching to relive and often times practically impossible to describe on paper. This chapter almost wrecked me, physically as well as mentally. To this day, I'll never understand the evil that my grandmother and all her children lived with. She was a miracle. My mother, aunts and uncles were as well.
Joyce Meyer, and others, have often stated that "hurting people hurt people." Yes, they certainly do. The damage these "hurting people" cause can often ensure the cycle of pain and abuse to trickle down the family line as well. In fact, it gives the next generation an excuse to abuse their own children with that way of thinking.
This chapter's focus remains on the unbreakable, unshakeable spirit of a family that fought daily for their ultimate survival and escape to freedom from abuse. We learn of how the cycle of abuse stopped with its perpetrator, losing its power to continue down the family bloodline.
If truly desired, "you CAN change your stars," as William Thatcher (Heath Ledger) stated in the movie, “A Knight’s Tale." Hurting people can break the cycle and refrain from hurting others or continuing the abuse that tries to keep its hold on bloodlines. As mere mortals, we actually do have the authority to overcome anger or even abusive tendencies, especially if we believe in God.
Acts 2:39 (NIV) tells us that "The promise is for you and your children and for ALL who are far off--for ALL whom the Lord our God will call." All promises in the Bible were put there for us. As a believer, you have a blood-bought right to all the promises of God in your life. You are an "ALL."
If anger is an issue for you, absolutely seek counseling if necessary. There is no shame in getting help.
It will ease your mind, give you peace and edify your soul if you just meet Him in His Word. All of the answers we seek can be found there. If you quiet your self in prayer and seek Him in the Bible daily, you will find that He will actually "call" as stated in Acts 2.
...and to be perfectly honest, it is absolutely the BEST feeling when He does!
As mentioned at the beginning of this blog post, “he who angers you controls you.” If you are aware of your triggers, pray about it, seek outside help if necessary, and stay in God’s Word. The enemy will lose his foothold and ability to control you.
Though it is often challenging to overcome past hurts and abuses, whether physical, psychological, or verbal, it can be done. Especially when anchored in God’s Word. Remember YOU are the one that Jesus loves. For YOU are fearfully and wonderfully made. (Psalm 139:14)
***Dear Heavenly Father,
Please touch the reader of this blog in such a way that your divine love and peace overtakes them. Thank you that while you are pulling them closer to your heart, the troubles of this world grow smaller, losing its negative hold. Thank you for the grace and mercy you so freely give to us each day. And Lord, we especially ask for forgiveness for times that we have allowed anger to get the better of us. We thank you that anger has no claim on us, our families, and entire bloodline, in Jesus' name. Father, I ask a special blessing over all who have been victims of past or present abuse of any kind. Lord please touch them and heal those memories and wounded hearts as only you can. We love you, Lord, and thank you for meeting us, as imperfect as we are, right where we live. Thank you for touching and changing hearts. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.***
“Supernaturally Dysfunctional” now available at
For a signed copy, please contact the author on this blog, or by email at sewoody16@gmail.com.
God bless💜
S.E.
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